Happy New Year!!

With the new year dawning like the sun rising over the earth, it provides a great time for reflecting on time. Its the age old question that philosophers throughout time have pondered. So why not Random Thought Thursdays? Its already kind of philosophical.
Time is nothing but Jell-O. This is because Jell-O tastes good. Just as long as you do not remember that you are eating pig's fat. What does this have to do with time? Time is like Jell-O because when ever you try to eat it, it disappears. This is like time because if you try to observe time it moves on.
Another observation about time is that if time flies, than what happens when it approaches the speed of light? As you know, the faster you travel the slower time flows so...
People complain about not having enough time. This puzzles me because if time is like Jell-O wouldn't it get old after having to eat it because your wisdom teeth were removed?
Anyway Happy New Year!
Cannot wait to see what weird things I will think of during the next year.

I should really post these on Thursday, but in the words of a knowing chaotician, "when you have an idea, you have an idea".

I was wondering, if you were forced to eat the piece of technology that you are reading this post on, how would you prep it? Would you put it in a hotdog bun? or maybe add ketchup and mustard. Today I will answer that question case by case incase you are forced to eat your phone or laptop.
Smart Phone: This one you would want to microwave and stick in a hotdog bun. Also add some   ketchup, lettuce, and pickle relish.
Tablet: Think turkey that was hit with a steamroller. Soak in salt for one day and cook until all the water is evaporated. Be careful that you do not cook it too long or it will get black and burnt. Some rosemary garnish would also improve the flavor.
Laptop: A laptop is nothing but a big tortilla. Have fun stuffing your laptop with sumptuous meets, spices and vegetables.
Monitor/Tower: Treat the monitor like a steak and the tower like last years thanksgiving leftovers.
If your monitor is small enough, fry it up on the barbeque and serve with sautéed onions. Add water and heat up the tower in the microwave until the microwave starts smoking.

Great! now you know how to eat your gadgets incase? Hmm... I am going to have to think about that one. Maybe someone mugs you and says that you have one day to eat your smartphone?
Post your answer in the comments. I'm stumped.

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A friend told me that if you look deep enough into someone's eyes, you will see pop tarts. Now what any sensible person would do would be to use a fishing pole and fish the pop tarts out of the persons eyes. Hahah! hmm. I am hungry. Be right back after a word from our sponsors. "Hello! Do you ever feel like something is missing in your life? Do you get pangs emanating from you stomach? I have the answer. It is called food. All you do is find something edible and stick it in an opening just underneath your nose called your mouth. After chewing carefully please swallow. This easy remedy should solve all of your hunger problems." Hey it me again! Yes I am still posting, still being weird, and still existing. So what was the random thought for this week? Oh yeah the pop tarts. I wonder how they got their name. First they do not reassemble anybody's father (I hope. If you do have a father that looks like a pop tart, then wow!) secondly they are the opposite of tart. Actually they are quite sweet.

Movie idea

I was thinking about it and I guess I can have somewhat serious ideas on here. It is random thought Thursdays, but does that mean serious thoughts? I guess that serious thoughts are probably the most random so it does qualify.
In most movies the villain has the psychopathy. It makes sense because psychopathy enables the person who has it to kill without feeling. In addition it is easy to dehumanize them because they do not have feelings or emotions.
With that said, I think that it would make an excellent movie premise if the hero is psychopathic. You may be wondering how on earth could this work? Despite all its downsides, psychopathy does have its positive sides. Not having emotions can strengthen a person just as easily as making them a killer. Think about it. If the hero is in a situation that would make a normal person panic our hero would coolly figure out how to get himself out of the situation. The hero would also have to cope with the bad sides of psychopathy to make it more interesting.

speaking of splendid spacious spectacular stinted snikering spiders...

Do spiders enjoy life? Seriously do spiders enjoy life?
When you flush them down the toilet do they get an exciting adrenalin rush of going at high speeds?
I would think that spider get a sense of accomplishment when they win a battle with a wasp and have a juicy dinner. Maybe spiders have legends about other spiders. Like maybe a legend about the first spider in space. I also wonder if they get depressed when they are about to be smashed (pun kind of unintended, well who am I kidding, that was 100% intended.
So next time you want to squish a spider remember that they have feelings (maybe). Then remember right after thinking about that, that their are millions of spiders, so go ahead and squish it as it will have a negligible effect on the ecosystem.

Oh no the uncivilized masses of YAHOOs are surfing the web!

If you did not take high school literature or just did not read Gulliver's Travels, then you skipped out on a forgettable experience. In this book, Gulliver  comes across a primitive people group called the Yahoos. Primitive does not describe them accurately. In fact they are more primitive than a sea cucumber. Anyway the only way that these Yahoos survive is because the horses, who are intelligent, look out for them. This got me pondering. Why would you name your company after a primitive race of humans? I mean isn't  Houyhnhnms much easier to pronounce?
As I was saying, if you were to name your internet company Yahoo, than you probably wanted to make the people who use your services sound intelligent. Because the obvious conclusion is that people who use Yahoo are Yahoos.
I also wonder if this means that the managers at Yahoo are called Houyhnhnms.
And if you are wondering what I am saying, join the club! I am kind of  confused my self.

Arachnaphobia

Many people have arachnid phobia. Approximately half of the women in the US, and a quarter of the men in the US suffer from it. That is too many. Why are people afraid of a small creature that is probably not poisonous. That is about 2% of 63000 different species of spiders or poisonous! It probably is the fact that spiders a crawly creatures that kill harmful insects. Or maybe because they bite insects that walk into their web. Well you know what? Statistically you might have eaten a spider in your sleep. Did you die? Obviously not if you are reading this. If you are dead and reading this. Um. Why would you be reading a blog. Go out their and do something! That is if you are dead. Okay that was weird. What was I saying? Yeah, something about spiders. hmm. Oh yes that's right. As I was saying before I rudely interrupted myself, spiders are great pets. Don't laugh, if you release an egg sac in your house, I bet that you will find many less bugs that are more dangerous than spider. Bugs such as flies. That's another thing, why aren't people afraid of flies?