Thursday, December 31, 2015

Happy New Year!!

With the new year dawning like the sun rising over the earth, it provides a great time for reflecting on time. Its the age old question that philosophers throughout time have pondered. So why not Random Thought Thursdays? Its already kind of philosophical.
Time is nothing but Jell-O. This is because Jell-O tastes good. Just as long as you do not remember that you are eating pig's fat. What does this have to do with time? Time is like Jell-O because when ever you try to eat it, it disappears. This is like time because if you try to observe time it moves on.
Another observation about time is that if time flies, than what happens when it approaches the speed of light? As you know, the faster you travel the slower time flows so...
People complain about not having enough time. This puzzles me because if time is like Jell-O wouldn't it get old after having to eat it because your wisdom teeth were removed?
Anyway Happy New Year!
Cannot wait to see what weird things I will think of during the next year.

Sunday, December 27, 2015

I should really post these on Thursday, but in the words of a knowing chaotician, "when you have an idea, you have an idea".

I was wondering, if you were forced to eat the piece of technology that you are reading this post on, how would you prep it? Would you put it in a hotdog bun? or maybe add ketchup and mustard. Today I will answer that question case by case incase you are forced to eat your phone or laptop.
Smart Phone: This one you would want to microwave and stick in a hotdog bun. Also add some   ketchup, lettuce, and pickle relish.
Tablet: Think turkey that was hit with a steamroller. Soak in salt for one day and cook until all the water is evaporated. Be careful that you do not cook it too long or it will get black and burnt. Some rosemary garnish would also improve the flavor.
Laptop: A laptop is nothing but a big tortilla. Have fun stuffing your laptop with sumptuous meets, spices and vegetables.
Monitor/Tower: Treat the monitor like a steak and the tower like last years thanksgiving leftovers.
If your monitor is small enough, fry it up on the barbeque and serve with sautéed onions. Add water and heat up the tower in the microwave until the microwave starts smoking.

Great! now you know how to eat your gadgets incase? Hmm... I am going to have to think about that one. Maybe someone mugs you and says that you have one day to eat your smartphone?
Post your answer in the comments. I'm stumped.

Wednesday, December 9, 2015

?

A friend told me that if you look deep enough into someone's eyes, you will see pop tarts. Now what any sensible person would do would be to use a fishing pole and fish the pop tarts out of the persons eyes. Hahah! hmm. I am hungry. Be right back after a word from our sponsors. "Hello! Do you ever feel like something is missing in your life? Do you get pangs emanating from you stomach? I have the answer. It is called food. All you do is find something edible and stick it in an opening just underneath your nose called your mouth. After chewing carefully please swallow. This easy remedy should solve all of your hunger problems." Hey it me again! Yes I am still posting, still being weird, and still existing. So what was the random thought for this week? Oh yeah the pop tarts. I wonder how they got their name. First they do not reassemble anybody's father (I hope. If you do have a father that looks like a pop tart, then wow!) secondly they are the opposite of tart. Actually they are quite sweet.