A friend of mine (not mentioning any names) asked me to advertise for his business that he is starting. Its called "Free Money Removal Services" or FMRS. His business will remove money for you for free! for FREE!! I have placed a few orders myself. Its so useful, everyone I know has piles of useless cash lying around and my friend will remove them with no added charge (though it is advised to tip the person removing the money). I really don't know why people have not come up with this great idea before.
Besides studies show that 93.7% of Americans die because of suffocating under large piles of cash. This means that not only is he removing your cash but also potentially saving your life.
So please don't die from cash inhalation and call my pho..
I mean my friend. yes definitely a friend. Mere acquaintances really. Hardly know each other.