Last night, I wasn't sleeping and looked
outside my bedroom window and saw an alien planting mushrooms. These were
special mushrooms which glowed. My curiosity overwhelmed me and I quickly went
outside. The alien approached me and I had no idea how I should respond. The
alien greeted me saying, "Greetings, oh sleepless one! I was wondering
when you would come." I was taken aback by this seemingly polite greeting
and I managed to say, "Well, it isn't every night that I have seen a
visitor from a distant land planting glowing mushrooms."
"Ah, yes our race takes care of the
mushrooms in the galaxy, and the mushrooms send us signals about what happens
here on earth."
"But I have dissected mushrooms and we
eat mushrooms all the time."
Well, I will explain more to you later on
about the importance of mushrooms to the universe, but here are instructions
for you to meet another one like yourself who grows vegetables, but also has
been instructed on how to train cows to resist gravity."
"I have been taught that gravity is a
constant."
"Oh, yes gravity is a constant to those
who sleep." Now I could understand that, because there have been times
when my lack of sleep has caused me to feel light headed…maybe I was
levitating…Anyway I nodded my head since apparently I had much to
"learn." asked the alien how otherworldy the instructions were and
the alien replied, "They are directions using roads and your what do you
call them? Oh, that's right a car. Here are the mushroom spores to give to this
farmer.
"I must be going," said the alien,
"You should visit the farmer as soon as your time allows." And the
alien just disappeared. I walked back inside and went to bed not expecting to
sleep, but to think. In the morning, I arose and thought over the events of the
previous night. I spent time trying to figure out how much was my own
imaginings and how much was real. Well, I had the mushroom spores and
directions to the farm. Those aliens know how to prey upon my curiosity. Isn't
there a saying that curiosity killed the cat? Anyway, I set off in my car and
the directions were detailed and led me there. My only complaint was the traffic
leaving town. The farm was located near the coast which has an excellent
climate for growing mushrooms, and was surround by hills. This protected it
from any passing cars. It felt really strange to be visiting a complete
stranger's house/place of business for no other reason than dropping off
mushroom spores that some creature from another solar system or galaxy gave me
the night before. I guess I could give the farmer the excuse that I must have
been hallucinating. As these thoughts were going through my head, I parked my
car and got out. I didn't see anyone at first, but then the clouds parted and
the sun shone. I noticed something shiny. Knowing that conspiracy theorists
like tin foil hats, I had a funny idea enter my head and I decided to follow it.
Thus, I walked toward the shiny object. As I walked closer, I saw a barn and a
man wearing a ten gallon tin foil hat mixing what appeared to be feed.
-Signy
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